Monday, July 29, 2013

MARRIAGE MONDAY: COMMUNICATION UPSTAIRS

Brad from One Flesh Marriage shares with us for this month's Marriage Monday post. Be encouraged in your prayer life today! Read more posts from our Marriage Monday series and bless your children!

You will be encouraged in your marriage as adoptive/foster parents at Hope at Home 2013, September 27-28. Find out more details and to Register Today-- it will be a wonderful time of connection and help for your parenting journey!

From Brad:
Men are notoriously bad communicators. Most men would love to get their point across with as few words as possible. Then we go to church and are told that we need to “pray without ceasing”? Communicate, with God, without stopping? Really? Is that even possible?

Prayer is a conversation with our Father. It is our connection. As a history buff I have often thought about how difficult it would have been to have a strong relationship with another person when the only option was writing letters. But if we don’t pray, the only communication we have with our Abba father is his letter to us. 
In my relationship with our father I have discovered four different types of prayer. All are important and happen at different times and ways.

Prayers of Desperation

This is in-the-moment lifting up prayers about immediate issues, questions, or problems, seeking God’s guiding hand. This is something that I have been in the habit of for a long time, and how I pray most frequently. More often than not, I simply ask, “Lord, I have no idea what to say or do, give me direction."

Prayers of Conversation

These are longer, more in depth prayers where both talking, and more importantly, listening happens. For me, I periodically will take a pen and journal, disappear to somewhere quiet and listen, lifting up my thoughts, plans, concerns and weakness, listening for God’s whispers in response. 
I really enjoy these get away times, and cherish the things that I have learned when I remember to take the time to get my head out of the day to day, and just sit and listen. Unfortunately, it is all too easy to allow life or crisis' crowd out these times.

Prayers of Everyday

These are the prayers for the everyday things that go on all the time, for the lives of your family, the daily conversation about what is going on with God. This is where the conversation with God is supposed to happen. Of course you don’t need to go around your day muttering to yourself, or asking God to help you pick out your morning cereal. That isn’t what "pray without ceasing" means anyway. All this verse means is that you carry God with you all day. 

Prayers Together

Many couples do not pray together. Maybe they say something over their food, but they don’t take time to actually stop and pray together about and for each other. Why? Because it is way too intimate! Yes, you heard me right; I think most couples don’t pray because it is too intimate. 
How do you start this type of upstairs communication? Well, it simply requires one person to grab the other and say, “Can we pray together?” Will it be uncomfortable at first? Yes, I am sure that it will, because it is so intimate. As you get more and more comfortable talking to God together you will find that it does amazing things to draw you together!
Do you pray together regularly? If so how did you make it a habit?
If you don’t pray together why not?
Share with us in the comments!

4 comments:

  1. My husband and I pray together before he goes to work each morning. We also take communion and pray together on Sunday nights. That was a habit my parents had, and I'm glad we have made it part of our Sabbath.

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    1. Susannah, how wonderful! I love it that you share communion together on Sundays. I think I may have to steal that idea! I have no doubt that your marriage is the stronger and more enjoyable for it. Thanks so much for sharing with us.

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  2. So true, Brad! Prayer is just about the most intimate act a couple can do together (except for one other thing - ahem). It's so important to keep spiritual intimacy in the mix.

    Thanks for this great reminder, Brad!

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    1. I thought this was very insightful too, Scott-- hadn't really thought about the intimacy in prayer before I started reading what you and Brad share on your blogs. So true.

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