STRENGTHENING OUR CHILDREN IN THE LORD

From Susan:

I am at that glorious stage of life in which three of my sweet daughters -- Cristi, Masha, and Ksusha -- have little baby girls of their own, ages 1 year, 2 months, and 1 week!  They live in North Carolina, Atlanta, and Texas!  Brian and I have had some time with all of them over the past week!  And of course I was longing to pour what I learned over all my 150 plus years of cumulative parenting experience into my sweet daughters (poor things!), and a deep longing to pass some of this along to you has been awakened as well!  (Please keep reading - this post will be short I promise!) 

A Way of Seeing

A Christian classic I love is a book by Edith Schaeffer called A Way of Seeing.  In this book of essays, Schaeffer takes something as simple as a rock and writes of fresh truths revealed through the beauty and majesty of creation.  I have made it my habit in life to look for people whose habits I want to copy in areas where I am weak. Having not grown up in a Christian home, when our kids were little I realized I had NO IDEA how to help them become strong in faith.  Schaeffer's habit of intentionally having open eyes was something I copied, big time!  And if I am really honest, I am hoping some of you will copy her indirectly after reading this post!  I learned from Schaeffer that from the youngest age, opportunities abound to talk with our children and indeed with other peoples' children, about the ways and wonders of God.  Because children are quick to see what adults miss (thus all Jesus' injunctions to us to 'become as children'), their hearts tend to be oh so open to the love of God!  All that is required from us is 'a way of seeing' God's glory bursting forth all round!

So...here are just a few examples from the past week:

Playing in the River and Deep Roots 

Yesterday it was our great honor and joy for none other than one of my heroes, Andrea Young, and her whole crew to come visit with their sweet Ukrainian summer guest Tanya.  As we were out playing in the river behind our house and saw deep roots, I was playing with sweet little Frank, who swims like a fish at age 3!!!  Here is our interchange.

Frank says to me: "Hey, why are those big logs lying flat in the river?"  

Richard, Frank, and Isaac

I reply, "Frank, do you see those big roots over there on the riverbank of all the trees standing tall, buddy?  Well, all these trees you see lying flat and dead in the river fell down with a CRASH when we had the big flood, because they had weak roots.  The Bible says we are supposed to be like those BIG tall trees with BIG roots that hold us STRONG in the soil of Jesus love, so that when problems of life come we will be able to stand strong."  Frank's eyes were big and bright and engaged, and I sensed he understood me in a real way!  It was so exciting!!!  Passing on those words of life to this sweet boy!!! 

Many Opportunities, in English and Russian!

Susan, Andrea, and the whole crew!

God also gave some wonderful opportunities to do this in Russian with Andrea and Richard's dear 15 year old guest Tanya, but I will refrain from writing all that Russian.  We had a number of our Hillis kids here at home, and Kristina Templeton (that treasure of a girl!!), and Andrea's family I am already thinking of playing matchmaker with little Isaac and our little granddaughter Naomi, seated at each end of the couch.  Everytime I see Naomi I lift my right pointer finger and sing 'this little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine!'  And I end looking in her eyes and saying some iteration of this: 'You are gonna let your little light shine, Naomi!  It is the light of Jesus' love!'

Sit, Stand, Walk

So here's one final example. Our daughter Cristi visited last week from North Carolina with her little 2 month old, Elyse. All little babies love music, and I am beginning to get the truth and word of God into her little soul by singing. And what is AAAMMMAAZZZIIINGGG is that she is beginning to sing with me.  Here is a short clip of us looking deep into each other's eyes and singing 'give thanks with a grateful heart...and now let the weak say I am STRONG!'  SHE IS SINGING!  At 2 months!!!  Just LOOK for yourself! 

All those examples above are applications of the Lord's words to us in Deuteronomy 6: "And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart.  You shall teach them diligently to your children and shall talk of them when you sit in your house and when you walk by the way and when you lie down and when you rise."

No Junior Holy Spirit 

I learned from my friend Jenni Means that children do not have a junior version of the Holy Spirit, but they are fully blessed by the entire presence of the Holy Spirit -- go back and review those verses about when Mary and Elizabeth visited each other in the first chapter of Luke!  And if you want YOUR kids to benefit from Jenni Means gifts of leading children into intimacy with the Lord (Beth Templeton and I, along with some of our older children will also be helping), you may want to bring them to Hope at Home Kids on August 4 (for those of you at the Created for Care conference, Jenni will be doing the Date with God time for kids!) 

The Blessing

What accrues to our little children as we speak words of life is that their internal spiritual roots are strengthened, which helps protect them from the wrong kind of 'sitting, standing, and walking' that Psalm 1 warns against:

 Blessed is the one who does not walk in step with the wicked or stand in the way that sinners take or sit in the company of mockers

(I just have to add that our college age son Alex and I spent a morning at the beach 2 weeks ago doing a bible study on these dangers from Psalm 1 - what a blessing to hear all God was showing him!!!)  What accrues to our dear children instead when we talk with them as we "sit, stand, and walk," about the wonders and ways of our Lord and His love, is that they begin to grow with the blessing of those whose "God is the Lord and whose hope is in the Lord.. they will be like a tree planted by streams of water."(Psalm 1)   

Yes, Lord, this is our prayer - for all the kids entrusted to our care, those near and those far, both literally and figuratively.  Amen and Amen.

WHAT'S FOR DINNER?

Often the most simple things of daily life communicate the deeper things in our hearts. I know that the importance of family dinners is not a new topic to most, but maybe you are like me and the reminders serve as an antidote to the strong pull of busy schedules. I find that when we are not intentional about family time in our home, we can go for days without having that connection. For the last few Christmas seasons I have sent out emails to all seven of our children with a list of possible dates and activities, asking them to choose and set aside those times so that we would be sure to have time together as a family. With the majority of our children away at college, this has worked well. But back in the day when we were all living at home we also had to be intentional. Here are some reasons and ideas for enjoying the benefits of family dinner times.

(As an aside, I feel that it is important to say that I have no desire at all for this post to come across as yet another thing you should be doing to be a good parent. Some of you have not had a family dinner in a long time, but you are connecting with your children in other real and significant ways. Maybe the family that has amazing dinnertimes does not have lengthy bedtime traditions, or regular "dates" with each child, or yearly weekends away..... The list can go on and on and on of all the good things we could be doing. I don't know about you, but there is simply NO WAY Stephen and I could implement all the great parenting ideas we have read about over the years! So, please know that at Hope at Home we never want to leave you feeling burdened or like a failure. We hope that this post, and any other thoughts we bring about parenting, will be helpful to you and leave you filled with Hope for your Home.)

A full dinner table, including cousins!

Atmosphere-- Not Just for Romance!

There is something about the smell of food cooking that speaks to us. Even the smell of broccoli steaming says something-- more than "ewwwww!" I hear the smell of dinner cooking saying, 

"you are loved. you are safe. you are cared for."

Family dinners do far more than provide food for your children. They help to create an atmosphere in your home. I try to light candles when we sit down to dinner, and even while I'm preparing, because I find that, like the smells, it communicates a sense of being special. It may seem strange if you associate candle light only with the occasional romantic dinner, but give it a try and see if you don't notice a difference. Grab your iPod and put on some music. Without words you are saying, 

"you are special. our family is special. our time together is special."

Consistent dinner times (yes, even the nights when there is more bickering than not!) foster feelings of warmth, unity, and bonding. With adoptive and foster families this is no small thing. In fact, I would say carving out time to carve that roast is a major tool in your ongoing work of bonding and the integration of your adopted or foster child into the complex mix of ingredients that make up your family. That sense of belonging, being a significant part of a whole, is key.

Relationship-- Conversation and Windows

One of the main reasons statistics show that consistent family meal times are beneficial for children, teens included, is because it serves as the context for authentic relationship. In between the, "pass the potatoes," and the "I hate green beans," are ideal times to connect. We have some talkers in our family, and we have the quiet types as well. So having a plan to guide the conversation can sometimes be helpful. For a season we used Monday night dinner time as an opportunity for everyone to share something that God has shown them in the last week. We kept it very broad-- it could be anything from a profound encounter during worship to a bible memory verse or something learned in children's church or youth group. Other nights we would go around the table and share one good thing and one hard thing that happened that day, or two things we are thankful for. Really, anything that will illicit a response and some interaction within the family is great. And be sure that both parents share too. Telling about a difficult situation at work is an effective way to help your children begin to understand your adult world. The goal is to share our lives with each other-- simple and quite powerful! This interaction gives us a window into our children's worlds as well. It get's us past the, "how was school sweetie?-- 'Good'" kind of thing. 

Training-- Imparting Vision and Identity

Once we have everyone all in one place it seems the best time for imparting some of the goodness of God into our children. Along with many other great ideas, we copied the Hillis family and would often have a book to read aloud as a family. Dinner time worked best for us, so Stephen or I would read a chapter from a biography of a Christian ( The Heavenly Man was our favorite), or a devotional type book, or scripture of course. Often I would find just a section of a book that I thought would be of interest and helpful, rather than feeling like we needed to read from beginning to end. When our children first came home from Russia we had to keep it short, but being flexible is part of family life already, isn't it?! These times together have served as a kind of anchor for our children, especially important in the teen years. 

There are a lot of other wonderful opportunities waiting for you at the dinner table-- the teaching of manners and social skills being no small thing, especially if you have children who grew up in an orphanage!! You are in a sense placing a deposit into your child's bank of emotional and spiritual stability. Definitely worth the effort!

So, next time your kids ask, "What's for dinner?!" you can respond, "Just a slice of love, a pinch of bonding, a dollop of relationship, and a spoonful of identity."  YUMMY!

Would you take the time to share some of your family's dinner time successes? What are some good conversation starters we could borrow from you? We love it when you leave a comment!!

BUSY TIMES CAN BREED OLD PATTERNS

MARRIAGE MONDAY

 
You may remember Brad Aldrich's post, Retreat Alone to Advancing Together from a couple of months ago. Well now you get to hear from his wife, Kate. Both Kate and Brad write and speak on all things marriage. In 2009 they followed God’s prompting and founded One Flesh Marriage Ministries, a blog based on their marriage journey and God’s word in Ephesians 5. Brad is a Pennsylvania Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and the director of the Family Resource and Counseling Centers. Kate is a homeschooling mom and a family photographer in her free time. God has given Brad and Kate three amazing blessings, two biological and one adopted who have enriched their life and marriage. 

Summer is finally here and the kids are done with school and I find myself thinking, “Oh good, now I have extra time to catch up and get things done.  Perhaps even do some of my “wish” list.”   Suddenly, I start to actually look at the summer schedule and wonder why every year I seem to think there will be more time during the summer???  Seriously, what was I thinking?  Between extra activities, play dates with friends, and vacations--there really are no lazy days of summer!  

For those of you who don’t know me, I am a stay at home mom, we homeschool our three kids and I am also a portrait photographer in my free time.  I am as busy as every mom out there.  But the summer that I thought would bring reprieve and extra time to accomplish things, is quickly becoming busier then the school year.  

I LOVE this time of year, truly I do!  There is so much fun to be had and memories to be made, yet in the busyness of it all, I feel and see myself start to struggle.  I have seen some patterns start to inch their way back to the surface of my life.  Past habits that I would rather not revisit.  Yet, despite all of this, I feel them tugging and tugging until I give in and let them dominate my personality and attitude.  I think in these fun, exciting, stressful, and busy times old habits come back to us so easily.  

When stress and busy times start to take a hold of me, old habits resurface, threatening to put my “self” at the center of everything.  We all have past habits and patterns that we struggle with.  For some of us, they rear their ugly heads when we are bored, for others it is when life is busy.  Are old habits vying for your attention this summer season?  If so, how? 

To be clear, I am talking about habits in our personalities that we have discovered to be stumbling blocks or unhealthy.  I am not speaking for those who struggle with addictive habits.  

Own it and Admit it to Your Spouse

Just recently I took a few minutes to share with Brad where I am struggling.  He listened and then shared that he could see that I was struggling as well.  Not in a condemning way at all, but supporting me and acknowledging that he understands where I am coming from.  Sharing it all with Brad was like literally getting a weight off of my chest.  Satan takes pride in having these things keep us bound up.  Bringing light into the darkness of our struggle’s, makes the darkness flee!  Take some time to share with your spouse where you are struggling.  There may be times where you will need to ask forgiveness from your spouse or others.  Be open and honest. 

Ask For Help

Brad knows me like no one else.  He also is my biggest fan and encourager.  He wants to see that I am happy, healthy and that I experience the life God has in store for me.  Asking him to help me turn these patterns back around is a wise thing to do.  Not only does it get him involved giving me accountability, but it also speaks volumes to our spouse about how much we need them.  We weren’t meant to do life alone, hence God’s awesome plan for marriage.

Be Prepared to Do Some Changing

This is the tough part!  When we see something in ourselves that we need to change, we have to be willing to do what we need to, to change!  It is a hard thing.  Seeking God on our knees, receiving forgiveness as well as asking God to lead us in changing these things.  Prayer and more prayer.  Get into God’s word, read and listen, perhaps more than your daily reading.  If we try to change these things with our own strength, we will always fall short.  With God’s leading, we can find freedom and grace.  God can give you the strength and tools you need to change.

As I was feeling convicted with my own attitude and old habits, I felt God asking me to share with you.  I am far from perfect or having life and marriage figured out.  Yet, I do know that I want to be the best “me” that I can be.  I want to be the person God created me to be!  I know in my heart when I am off balance.  As we look forward to the fun summer times with our families it is as good a time as any to work those kinks out!

I know there are other things we can do when we feel old habits coming the surface.  If you have other ideas, we would love to hear them!  Share with us your thoughts in the comment section.  

You will have the opportunity to hear more from Kate at HOPE AT HOME 2012-- be sure to register! She and Brad, along with Jenni and Scott Means, will be leading two breakout sessions on marriage entitled, "Adoption Through the Eyes of Marriage" and "A Marriage Made in Heaven: Pursuing a Kingdom Culture at Home." In addition Kate and Brad will lead a session on Transracial Adoption called, "The Joys of Godly Diversity - Reflections from a Transracial Family." 

To read more about our breakout topics go HERE.

THE FATHER'S GIFTS WERE THE SON'S WORDS

Lots of you know me (Susan Hillis) from the conferences and Facebook and email messages we share.  But few of you know my husband...  

To Contribute

I remember it as though it was yesterday.  Brian and I were sitting in our living room in our little farm house on Farrington Road in Chapel Hill, North Carolina, and a dear friend Annie from his UNC Master's Degree program was visiting us. At that time, we did not share a common faith, and she had many questions.  Like this one, for example, "So, Brian, how does your faith affect your goals in life?"

Brian, without batting an eye, replies something to this effect, "My goal in life is to contribute."

Annie asks, confused, "To contribute?...what do you mean, 'to contribute?'"

"I mean I want to contribute to making life better for my wife and for our children."

I had no idea during those brief moments the extremes of sacrificial service and unconditional love my unassuming and humble husband was prepared to give.  But now I do, and I want to tell you a little about it.  And about what it sometimes leads to.  I want to tell you because some of you share that goal of Brian's.  I will end this short post showing you some of what happened because Brian made that decision way back then....and stuck to it...day in, day out.

To Sacrifice

After loving numbers so much (though we are polar opposites on every personality inventory, at least we have a love of numbers in common!) that he passed all parts of the CPA exam on the first try, Brian went to work for a high-powered accounting firm.  

Over time as we sensed the Lord calling us to adopt (many children!), it was clear that it would take a full time parent to be available in order for the adoption to bring them fully into our family, not merely into our surname.  In talking and praying, we felt we would have more net time together as a family with me working full time than with the long hours that accounting work requires, so Brian cut back to part time at first (after adopting Anya and Alex and adding them to our other two, Cristi and Trevor!), and then totally quit working with the accounting firm after we adopted the next time.  

Gone were those interesting challenges and professional rewards, to be replaced by normal things parents do every day, like play with kids, tutor them, run car pool, take 10 different kids to 10 different activities every week....harp lessons, piano lessons, soccer practice, baseball practice, softball practice, art lessons, flute lessons, dancing lessons, wrestling practice -- and last but not least, to talk with them about God and life and relationships and forgiveness and hope...and lizards and frogs and oaks and seahorses and drought and physics and Bach and Monet.  Brian chose to respond to a higher calling than his professional one -- the call of the Lord for our family.  And boy, did he ever 'contribute!'

A Son's Words -  Alex and Sasha

So several days ago on Father's Day, two of our adopted sons (and in fact all of our kids through either letters, texts, or calls) said thank you to Brian.  

Our artist son Sasha communicated a lot while writing a little, in a short text from Alaska:

Happy Father's Day, dad.  I wish you a great day, and want to thank you for living your life in obedience to God's will, like that of Noah who lived a God-loving and fearing life, living by example, leading his family towards God's love, His truth and mercy, no matter how big and problematic circumstances might have been.

Our son Alex, who, with Trevor, is doing a Summer Leadership Project in Florida, wrote Brian a long letter.  Here are a few excerpts:

Today is Father's Day.  A day set aside to remind us how great and amazing fathers are to us...  Dad, I know you care little for a lot of sentimental praise, so I will limit my words of praise by saying I have known many fine fathers, and have read about many great men, yet I can truthfully say I am so blessed and so thankful that I am your son.  There are several reasons why I am glad you are my father. First you made my years of childhood and youth a period of life delightful.  I have really enjoyed just learning and watching you, how you have loved all the kids.,,,even on days when some of them treat you like crap.  ...I don't know how you loved all of us with unconditional love, but thank you.  You have been the best example to me of who Jesus Christ is.  I can't even imagine how wonderful God is, because you are so good.  If you are that great, God is just awesome.  Thank you again.  Second I want to thank you for helping me understand what it means to be a man.  ..what I am sure of is that if I am half the man you are, I will be grateful and happy.  You are truly a blessing in my life....I would not trade you for the world.  I love you!...Lastly I want to thank you for teaching me about God.  .... My relationship with God is so much closer because I can see through you the kind of man you can become, and I want that.  ....Well dad, I told you this was going to be short, but it came out of my heart and I meant every word....Thank you so much for sacrificing your life for me.  I hope one day I can sacrifice my life for you.  I love you!  Happy Father's Day.

My prayer for you dear reader

So now, I pray that that you, dear one who is reading this and who have adopted children or fostered them or who will someday adopt or foster children, or who perhaps are loving these or any other children in sacrificial and unconditional ways, will receive the heart-full gift of words on one of the Father's Days or Mother's Days down the road.  Words better than any present.  The unspeakable reward that becomes the present that makes you cry.

SUMMER DAYS-- WHAT TO DO?!

With summer in full swing we know that the hours of the day can seem to stretch out, and stretch and stretch ooouuuut.................. The children are at home and the schedules of the school year are over-- what to do with all those hours and all that energy?! Susan Hillis found a way to spend summer days with her large family of energetic children and we wanted to share this post with you again as you look for ways to enjoy your summer at home.

From Susan Hillis:

I spent many years at home with kids, having a desire to help them daily to avoid the self-indulgence embodied by our culture, and instead to replace it with the Lord's beauty and values.  So every day I would say something like this to start off the day, "Today we are going to do something for our eyes, something for our hands, something for our hearts, something for our brains, and something for our bodies." We actually had a poster where the kids had helped me draw 2 eyes, 2 hands, a simple heart, a wrinkly brain, and a stick figure body.  Often we would have a board of some kind and check off our activity when we had completed it.

Here are some examples of the kinds of things we did every day with this 5-fingered ingredients to a good day!

Eyes

"God gave us our eyes to see the beauty of His creation.  Let's go on a walk to see how many colors of flowers we can see (spring), or how many shapes of leaves we can pick up (fall), or how many sizes of acorns we can find (winter), or how many different kinds of bugs we see (summer)."  One May when some of the kids were out looking for bugs, Alex came home with a beautiful black spider, intrigued by the 'red squiggles on its stomach', and complaining of a swollen thumb where it had bitten him.  He proudly help up the spider in the bag, and we realized to our chagrin, that it was a black widow!  We called poison control and were told just to watch him - and he ened up being fine!  In spite of several of these types of extremes, we loved thinking together about this question, "Hey guys, what can we do for our eyes today?" 

Hands 

"God gave us hands to draw and color and play games and paint and play instruments.  We also need our hands to make yummy food and to eat with! Let's do something fun with our hands today." Then we would draw or color or paint or sculpt or make home-made playdough or play home-made oatmeal-can drums.  Sometimes we would make cards for each other or send a picture to a sick friend.  Sometimes we would eat spaghetti with our hands or mix up squishy cookie dough with our fingers.  Sometimes we would play simple games like CandyLand with our hands. 

Hearts 

"God loves us a ton. More than we can imagine.  It is amazing that he says if we do just 2 things, we will have a good life, one that makes us happy and God  happy. The first one is this: He tells us, 'love the Lord your God with all your heart and soul and strength and mind, and the second one God tells us to love your neighbor as much as you love yourself. Today lets talk about what we could do to show love to God or someone else."  We might decide to go visit someone lonely and take them a picture, or we might go serve at a food pantry, or we might sing some praise songs together or read a Bible story or act out a story like Daniel in the lion's den. One memorable day we went on a walk around the block to visit a 92 year old woman. We found her stooped in her nicely manicured lawn, cutting a few pieces of grass with scissors. "Hello, we thought we might visit with you a little while."  She invites us in, "I always liked girls better than boys," she says, looking intently at our son and daughter.  Then she proceeds, "I am  so glad to be out of that hell-hole."  I proceeded to ask her what she meant.  This is what she called the nursing home she had been confined to temporarily when she broke her hip. Needless to say, once we left, I had some new lessons to teach about God's view of girls and boys being both His favorites! About how hard life can become for old people. About how proud I was of them for showing God's love. And we talked about how our hearts feel when we show love to someone. "Warm  inside." "My heart feels happy."

Brains

"God gives people a brain that can do things that none of the animals can do. Like math. Like thinking about complicated questions. Like creating and using words.  When we use our brains to learn about God's world, we can serve Him in ways that are so very special. Let's talk about what we want to learn about this week."  If it was the week of the black widow, we may learn about spiders.  If we had been painting the night sky, I might pull out Van Gogh's 'Starry Night' and teach them a little about Van Gogh as a man and as an artist. 

Bodies 

"God gave us bodies that enjoy moving and exercising and jumping and running. He says He made our body to be the place He lives inside of, with His Holy Spirit.  In the Bible we learn that our body is a temple of the Holy Spirit. Let's talk about what we can do to keep our bodies in good shape today."  We might run or skip or do dance exercises or swim or hike or play four-square or basketball.  If it was rainy we sometimes would go to a gym to run around. Or sometimes we would put on old clothes and go sliding into mud puddles. One memorable day our neighbors had a huge 12 foot long, 3 foot wide puddle.  We decided it would be so fun to pretend it was a slippy pool slide - so we ran outside to play.  Before I knew it lots of the bored neighbor kids had joined us! I did not quite know what to say, when, after getting cleaned up, I ran into one of the neighbor kid's moms and she began to complain about how crazy her kids had been that day - sliding in the mud and rain of all things!  I was too embarrassed to tell her it was my idea!

So, often the posts I offer are more thoughtful, devotional, or testimonial.  Today I just wanted to share the structure that was the under-girding foundation for so many wonderful conversations about God and life and the world and beauty, and that at the same time laid down scores of fun memories!

God bless each of you!

Share the things you do at home with your children in the comment section. Let's help each other out!

Happy Summer!!

Be sure to LIKE us on Facebook. It's a great way to find out about Hope at Home events and receive daily encouragement. 

THE BEAUTY OF DESTRUCTION

Recently I wrote a post about Fighting, and now I'm talking about Destruction. You are probably getting a bit concerned! But just like the post on fighting was about the Good fight of faith that we are called to fight on our child's behalf, this post is about the Beauty that can be found in destruction. 

 There is no one like the God of Jeshurun, who rides the heavens to help you... The eternal God is your refuge, and underneath are the everlasting arms; He will thrust out the enemy from before you, and will say, “DESTROY!” Then Israel shall dwell in safety... Who is like you, a people saved by the Lord! The shield of your help and the sword of your majesty! Your enemies shall submit to you, and you shall tread down their high places.Deuteronomy 33:26-29

Faces of the Enemy

Are you loving this as much as I am?! There are times as a parent when I see that I am called to take a stand and command destruction-- the destruction of those things that threaten to diminish the freedom that belongs to my child in Christ. Over the years since we first brought our children home we have seen the ugly face of the enemy revealed. An enemy that would take advantage of a precious child in a vulnerable position not of his own making, a child in need of a family and of safety and love. Maybe you have dealt with some of these faces of the enemy too in your home, an enemy whose expressed purpose is to steal, to kill and to destroy. (John 10:10) These faces look a lot like rejection, a victim mentality, fear, anxiety, a lack of healthy bonding. 

You know those verses in Psalms that speak of destruction of enemies? I used to be uncomfortable with those. They just didn't fit into my nice Christian world; I didn't relate. But I find myself quite comfortable with verses like "in your steadfast love you will cut off my enemies, and you will destroy all the adversaries of my soul" (143:12) these days. I see clearly now that it is indeed God's steadfast love that motivates the destruction of those things that attack my soul and oppose the work of God in our family-- in  my children. Oh yes, I am quite comfortable with this! Bring it on I say. I am not a theologian and my understanding of these things is limited, but I do find that when I read these verses and think of the enemies that so many orphans and adopted children face, I can add my Amen to the call for destruction.

Bring It On!

What I am so captivated with I think is that the enemy is not the only one bent on destruction; our Amazing Awesome God is the best destroyer ever! He is Radiant in Splendor and Majesty and the hills melt like wax before Him. (Psalm 97:5) Oh He is Mighty to Save, our Mighty Rock. Dear ones, maybe some of you are face to face with the results of the enemy's destruction as you are raising your child. There is good news for you and for me. God has not left us without recourse. He has given us weapons of destruction far more effective than any weapon the enemy has used or will use. 
And these weapons of destruction are strange in their effect--when we use them the result is nothing like the ugly wounds we would expect a weapon to leave. The result is a beautiful thing: wholeness, life, and health. This is a glorious destruction!

For the weapons of our warfare are not physical [weapons of flesh and blood], but they are mighty before God for the overthrow and destruction of strongholds, we demolish arguments and theories and reasonings and every proud and lofty thing that sets itself up against the [true] knowledge of God; and we lead every thought and purpose away captive into the obedience of Christ 2 Corinthians 10:4-5

Powerful Words of Life

Do you see these words of life? How like our God to turn something upside down and use it for His glorious purpose! Words like overthrow, destruction, demolish and captivity are turned on their heads. They morph from words that we associate with pain and trouble to become Words of Life, beautiful and powerful. 

So, I find that I am all about destruction these days. I join my voice in agreement with my Father God and proclaim, "DESTROY!" Will you join me?

Lord God, even now we shout destroy to the works of the enemy in our precious children's lives. We call for the destruction of everything that would raise itself up above the truth of Your Love at work in them and in our families. Thank You for the authority we have as believers and parents to release the Beautiful Destruction of all that is not of You in our homes. We set our children apart to live unhindered by any destruction that has come as the result of being relinquished, rejected, abandoned and unloved in their past. For indeed, who is like those who are saved by the Lord and who dwell in safety?! Let it be as You have said Lord God.

Wouldn't you like to join us at HOPE AT HOME 2012, 
October 5-6 in Atlanta, GA, where you will have many opportunities to join with other parents of faith to command the destruction of the work of the enemy in your child's life and to believe God for His amazing restoration work?!  We have a team of believers who are preparing and training to pray with you throughout the conference. I know for Stephen and me, being able to pray with others over some of the issues we have faced as adoptive parents has been a key in our parenting. 

WHO WE ARE AND WHAT WE HAVE

From Susan Hillis:

Who we are

I got to be right beside our 2 little granddaughters this week end when their eyes saw and their toes touched the ocean for the very first time.  I love relaxing here at the beach and reflecting on the goodness and greatness of God.  So, dear friends, having just spent the early morning sitting with our daughter Cristi's baby, Elyse, and talking with her about her identity and destiny, I decided to pass the blessing I just gave her, on to you.  As usual, there is a story behind it!

About 4 years ago a godly man in his 70s visited our church. His reputation preceded him, as one who had memorized thousands of Scriptures, and loved giving biblical blessings to folks.  We had the chance to meet each other and he said he was passing on to me  

"The blessing of Benjamin,the beloved of the Lord dwells in safety. The High God surrounds him all the day and dwells between his shoulders."  

(Deuteronomy 33:12)

I thought, "that's weird, what in the world does 'dwell between his shoulders' mean?  I opted for being thankful for the safety part of the verse, and in a short span, it slipped out of my mind.  Until I read and reread it from time to time in my regular read-thru-Bible-in-a-year plan.  That small seed of encouragement, planted by someone I saw only once, in a brief encounter, has become a tall trunk of blessing in my life!  It is who I want to be, and trust that, in the Lord, I am becoming. It is who Elyse is and is becoming. 

It is who you are and are becoming.  "The High God dwells between his shoulders" means, for me, in those key centers of life...the mind, the heart, and the voice!  Because our brain, our heart, and our vocal chords are all 3, "between the shoulders."  As Jesus "puts his law into our minds and writes them in our hearts" (Heb 8) it is only natural that His words will find expression in our voices!

What we have

Copy cats. We have what that old man had. The living and active blessing and encouragement of God to pass on.  So I am trying to copy my dear friend Elizabeth Styffe who does this better than anyone I know.  I want to pass along encouragement to all those I meet.  It is what I have to give, ever and always.  It is what you have to give. "Encourage each other every day" (Heb 4:13).  It is one of the means the Lord uses to help us dwell in safety.  

For more encouragement along the adoption journey, Hope at Home 2012 is the place to be! Susan will be sharing in both main and breakout sessions. You will love to talk with Susan in person and hear her share more. Now the grandmother of two, one from a biological daughter and one from an adopted daughter, she has much wisdom and love to give.